In Which I am told that I Should be Offended, When I’m Not

Yesterday on Facebook I posted this meme:

Today a well meaning friend on my Facebook advise me that the term “fair sex” in relation to women is offensive. I said that in this context I didn’t find it offensive and most contexts I don’t. I then stated that I find it more degrading that women fight so hard for something that objectifies them and causes death, cancer and blood clots. 

He ignored everything and again stated that no, fair sex is sexist to all women.

And I was truly flabbergasted. Not that he said anything really offensive, or because he ignored the entire point of the post or raising awareness to Natural Family Planning (NFP) during NFP Awareness week, I was shocked that a man could tell me that I should be offended by a term he deemed as sexist. That a man could tell me (a woman) what I should feel.

Because he is one of the progressives, the feminists, the one who value equality, equal rights and the opinion of others. And it again cemented why I can’t consider myself a feminist.

I can’t consider myself a feminist because I can think for myself and have my opinions.

I can’t consider myself a feminist because I believe that women are my equals, my sisters and not my competition.

I can’t consider myself a feminist because I can’t support the the killing of unborn children in the name of my empowerment.

I can’t consider myself a feminist because the wage gap scandal? It’s a lie.

I can’t support feminism because I do not believe that free, legal, birth control and abortion on demand are more important that the plight of women around the world who are being raped, trafficked and kidnapped.

I can’t support anything that the puts the value of self over the value of others. And that is what feminism does.

I was raised in an environment where I was treated no differently than my brother, where my dad didn’t do much housework because he was the sole wage earner and my mother stayed at home. In this environment I was never taught that a women’s responsibility was to be in the home, I was taught that I could do what ever I wanted and be whoever I wanted to be. I was taught that men and women were equal, and that working outside the home or being a stay at home mom were both stressful, fulfilling and worthy decisions.

But then, a few years ago after I got over my whole “I never want children” thing, and I realised that, at the age of 24, I wanted nothing more to be a wife and mother and have lots of children. I kept this to myself, however, because I had learned in university that being a stay at home mom was not worthy. It was something to want or to desire. Women are more than mothers.

I told my aunt I wanted to be a stay at home mom, and she said, “you could accomplish so much more than that”.

Feminism is not about equality, no matter what the dictionary says. Feminism in the 21st century is about the value of self above all. Feminism is about competition and one upping women. Feminism is above valuing all the thing things that make women, women. Feminism is about smashing an invisible patriarchy and rising above men. Not equality.

Modern 21st century Feminism, in all the collective power and call to action, can never manage more than hashtag outrage against the plights of women in developing world, but they can cause a stink and a stir if you try to take away their birth control or abortion.

They tell you to think for yourself, and then shame you if you disagree. The vitriol that spews from the comments that I’ve seen on the internet and heard in real life is atrocious. They tell you what to think, and then beat you into submission if you try to tell them they are wrong.

Feminism is not a term I can comfortably associate with because feminist action often disagrees with the definition of what they claim to be.

I don’t believe that men are the enemy.

I don’t believe I am a victim because I am a woman.

I don’t believe that I am oppressed because I am a woman.

I don’t believe women are the competition or the enemy.

I don’t believe than anyone has the power to tell me what to think.

I am not scared of my ability to make children or having a child depend on me.

Modern 21st century feminism has sown nothing but seeds of mistrust and anger sown with the blood of children aborted for the cause.

If they were throwing their power to actually change the world and fight for equality, real equality that isn’t based of contraception and abortion, instead of squabbling for freebies, then, maybe, I could consider myself a feminist.

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Standing with the Nasrani

Today on Facebook, I changed my Profile Picture to this:

I did this because I’ve been ready some scary, scary stuff about ISIS, Iraq and the Christians of the Middle East.

I’m going to preface this by saying that I have no animosity towards Muslims. Many, many, many of them are peaceful, loving, respectful men and women of great faith. I still pray for them and ultimately for their conversion to the Catholic faith, but ultimately I understand that cultural ties to a religion make it difficult to convert and the God will be merciful upon them. I believe the ecumenism is important and religious tolerance is important as well.

That said, I am alarmed and concerned about ISIS and the more militant Muslims. I am concerned about Sharia law and I am concerned with their complete lack of religious tolerance. 

According to several news reports and a letter from the Patriarch of the Chaldean Catholic Church, ISIS is specifically targeting Christians. These Muslims are spray painting the Arabic letter N which is an indicator that Christians live there. 

They are giving these Christians 3 options: Convert, Pay a tax that non-Muslims must pay (undisclosed amount) or face death. 

Many people are still claiming that most Muslims disagree with ISIS and they are targeting other Muslims as well and this is true. Many people are commenting that this is just a small group, we out number them and they will be defeated. 

But at what cost? I don’t like to make comparisons to Nazi Germany, but some of the comparisons are startling. 

source

Painting on building to indicate that an unwanted lives or works there? Creating ID cards to indicate what religion or sect you belong to? This  has happened before and, like now, people were told not to worry because Hitler was just one guy and we can beat him.

And we did. But only after millions and millions of innocent people were slaughtered.

It shouldn’t have happened then, and it shouldn’t be happening now.

It’s time to pray. 

It’s time for solidarity.

It’s time to say no more.

No more unnecessary deaths.

No more innocent deaths. 

No more jihad.

No more white-washing and in offensive newscasts.

I believe most Muslims don’t want this, but, just because a majority may not want this it doesn’t mean we should be afraid to report the truth.

Something needs to be done. I don’t have answers, and I don’t know what to suggest but pray. Pray for the leaders.

Pray for the innocents.

Pray for harmony.

Pray for conversions of heart.

Pray for conversions of mind.

Pray unceasingly, Pope St. John Paul II helped end communism in the USSR using only prayer. It works and it is powerful. The Lord listens to His people, but sometimes we need to learn lessons first. Sometimes we need to realize we don’t have other options. 

He listens, call on him to end the terror. 

Pray for Israel, Palestine and the Gaza region as well.

Just pray, and never cease. 

Because the Muslims have declared jihad on the Holy Lands before, and now, just like then, we can win them back.

Also: http://www.crisismagazine.com/2014/common-heritage

Sources:
http://www.aina.org/news/20140720122948.htm
http://www.aina.org/news/20140720122948.htm
http://www.buenanueva.net/Cruzadas/CruzTheDefensGest.htm
http://www.thearma.org/essays/Crusades.htm#.U8xp9YBdW_c

20 Reasons I don’t Use Birth Control

When I am at work and it gets quiet and I have exhausted the articles on every single other website I read, I sometimes check out Buzzfeed. This week there were 2 articles this week and both of them made me sad.


22 Reasons Why Women Take Birth Control.

 

Now, I only have 20 but I am also only 1 person:

 

 

  1. Self Control is real. Humans are not animals and it is disrespectful to ourselves to act like we have no control over our impulses and decisions
  2. The birth control pill is a level 1 Carcinogen. The same level of classification as tobacco and formaldehyde (http://monographs.iarc.fr/ENG/Classification/ClassificationsGroupOrder.pdf (pdf))
  3. Because I want my future marriage to have the best chance of success http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/8226959/Couples-who-dont-have-sex-before-marriage-are-happier-study-claims.html
  4. Because I don’t want my future marriage to end in divorce (http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/religion/2558098/posts)
  5. Because I don’t want an unnecessary death (http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/yaz-yasmin-birth-control-pills-suspected-in-23-deaths-1.1302473  and http://www.vanityfair.com/politics/2014/01/nuvaring-lethal-contraceptive-trial)
  6. Because I don’t want a blood clot (http://www.drugwatch.com/yaz/blood-clots/)
  7. Because I don’t want a stroke (http://womenshealth.gov/publications/our-publications/fact-sheet/stroke.html#j)

  8. Because I don’t want to risk my health in order to break my normally functioning body. There is no reason to take a prescription when your body is working as designed. Breaking something that isn’t broken and risk serious side effects and death doesn’t make sense to me
  9. Because I believe that all life is important and unique, even in the pre-implantation embryonic phase. Some birth control pills cause early first trimester abortions. I don’t intend in taking a life intentionally, and I certainly don’t want to take one accidentally. Birth control that causes abortion:  Plan B, IUDs, Yaz & Yasmin, The Pill, The Minipill and Depo-Provera (http://www.lifeissues.org/abortifacients/)
  10. Because women are powerful because we can bring forth life. We don’t need to supress what is distinctly female to move ahead in life. 
  11. Because I believe sex and love should not have exceptions or conditions. To say “I like every thing about you and I want to be with you. But I don’t like what your body can do.” Is not love, love should be free, unifying and giving. 
  12. Because I have control over my life by tracking my cycles. I know when I can become pregnant and when I cannot. I don’t need chemicals to regulate me.
  13. Because there are other ways to treat acne (http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/acne/basics/treatment/con-20020580)
  14. Because there are other ways to treat cramps (http://breakingmuscle.com/womens-fitness/treating-cramps-and-heavy-or-irregular-cycles-without-birth-control)
  15. Because there are other ways to treating women’s reproductive health (http://www.naprotechnology.com/surgical.htm)

  16.  Because taking contraception puts all of the responsibility on the women, natural family planning requires communication, trust and commitment. Things that lead to successful relationships
  17. Because there is power in knowing your cycles, when you smother the indicators with chemicals prescription you can miss warning signs that something might not be working properly in your body
  18. Because it can take up to 6 months for your body to become fertile again. 6 months for your body to start to do what it was designed to do. 

  19. Because I try to eat clean and care about what I put in my body, I try to avoid overly processed food and junk food. I care about hormones and additives in my food and prefer cooking from scratch. Why then would I willingly take large amounts of unnecessary hormones?
  20. Because Natural Family Planning is not your great grandma’s rhythm method. It’s based on science and can be uniquely tailored to each women’s cycle. Plus there are apps you can get for your phone which make it super easy to track

 

 

So, I don’t have pretty pictures or hashtags but I strongly believe that the best thing a woman can do is ditch the pill, ditch the birth control and actually take control of her body. There is only a 7 day window in the month a woman is fertile. If having sex and not making babies is that important to you there is still an all natural way of avoiding pregnancy. 

 

And it leads to stronger relationships because it requires support, trust and understanding. In our society that is littered with broken hearts and broken families, maybe it is time to reconsider how we treat ourselves and each other in our sexual relationships. Maybe the focus should be less on sex and more on building a strong foundation (which NFP does).

 

 

Just a thought.

 

More information:

1flesh.org

iusenfp.com 

 

PS. It’s also equally as effective as hormonal methods and more effective than barrier methods when done correctly:  http://www.aafp.org/afp/2012/1115/od1.html and http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/6375261.stm

PPS. Couples who use NFP tend to have more sex and for longer periods of time in their life: http://www.nfpta.org.uk/faq.html#q5

 

7 Quick Takes: Social Justice, Steubenville and Buzzfeed!

I haven’t blogged in so long I’m concerned I’ll forget how to do it properly.

— 1 —

I went to Steubenville Atlantic last weekend and it was glorious. Actually completely wonderful, and completely exhilarating. It was for teenagers, but, I had a blast. I’d never chaperoned anything before and this was my first time doing so but the girls in my group seemed to like me so that went well. Some of them even chose to sit up at the front of the bus on the way back home to sit closer to me. Wins all around.

It was a good time to just sit and be with God. To sing His praises and see him in the Eucharist at Adoration. I haven’t been to Adoration in ages and I knew it was coming and I actually got giddy, because JESUS IS COMING. It’s like Santa, but so so so so much better.

— 2 —

Some videos not from the one I went to:

 Sister Miriam was so wonderful!

 Father Leo Patalinghug (how had I never heard of him before?! He has cookbooks!)

Watch here: http://new.livestream.com/halifaxyarmouth/steubenville2014

For some silly reason they will not embed. Which is a paaain. But I’ll get over it. 

 

— 3 —

I saw this article on Buzzfeed earlier (slow day at work…) 

http://www.buzzfeed.com/yezminvillarreal/thoughts-everyone-has-at-catholic-mass

And I realized how far I’d come in my Faith, because, literally about 80 of these were me just a few years ago. I didn’t realize that the Eucharist was actually Jesus. 

I knew Jesus was the source and summit and yadda yadda, but I had no idea what transubstantiation meant. Texting during Church? Yep, I did it. Ugh, dark times people dark, dark time. This article didn’t offend me as it apparently did some (based on the few comments I skimmed) but it made me feel sad for the author, because she doesn’t know what she is missing. Praying for her, for her eyes to be opened.

— 4 —

I am in the middle of reading 2 books. A Man for All Seasons, which I’ve barely started, and The Urgency of the New Evangelization: Answering the Call. I have barely started AMFAS, but, I’m about 1/4 of the way into Urgency, and I am loving it. How do I still know so little about the Church. 10 years of Catholic education and 1 full year since I willingly crossed the Tiber and my goodness, I still know so little. It’s ridiculous. 

I am leading a discussion on Thursday on the New Evangelization, and I don’t even know what it is….so, I get to educate me self. I watch Fr. Barron’s Catholicism: The New Evangelization back in December, but, I’m not sure how much I retained. 

My favourite quote from the book so far: 

“If I were to describe how very many of our fellow Catholics, as was believers in the wider culture, look at these matters today, I would describe it like this: “Broad and wide is the that leads to salvation/heaven and almost everybody is on that way. Narrow and difficult is the path that leads to condemnation/hell and, very few, if any are on that road.” 

He then goes on to discuss Matthew 7:13-14 and Luke 13:23-24, because we know what the Bible and the Church said about certain things and we are willfully disregarding them.

 8 But you yourselves wrong and defraud, and that even your own brethren. 9 Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither the immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor sexual perverts, 10 nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor robbers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.  (1 Corinthians 6: 8-11)

3 And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” 4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who made them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder.” 7 They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” 8 He said to them, “For your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for unchastity, and marries another, commits adultery.” 10 The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is not expedient to marry.” 11 But he said to them, “Not all men can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. 12 For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. He who is able to receive this, let him receive it.” (Matthew 19: 3-12

We need to evangelize, we are called to evangelize, because the narrow gate leads to Christ. There is one truth, one Church, and one way to salvation. Through Christ’s Church. Through being Catholic, because you cannot have Christ without the Catholic Church and you cannot have the Catholic Church without Christ.  Go and make disciples of all nations!

— 5 —

I finished another book Saints and Social Justice by Brandon Vogt. It’s so good. I’m woefully undereducated on Catholic Social Teaching, but this was good. Plus I got to learn about different saints I’d never heard of. If you want to learn about some new saints and Catholic Social Teaching, check it out! 

— 6 —

Losing some steam. But, my goodness, I like Orange is the New Black. Honestly, most hilarious,   and weirdly uplifting show I’ve seen in a while. The power of redemption, consequences and friendship, yes, I’m ignoring the friends with benefits. They don’t count. Watch it, it’s inappropriate, addictive, and hilarious.

— 7 —

This:

I love this song. 

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!